MaleStandard

The Standard for Style and Lifestyle

You are here: Home / Archives for bar

Beware of the Leaching Bar Bitch

Posted by on October 18, 2010 · Leave a Comment 

Guys, I hate to break it to you, but many of you have fallen victim to “the leaching bar bitch.”

You know, that girl who’s flirting with you and gives you the vibe that there’s  “potential.” And then, as soon as you buy her a cocktail, she’s gone giggling with her girlfriends. I have seen this time and time again. So let’s get a couple of things straight and put that bitch in her rightful place.

Never assume that buying a girl a drink gets an automatic free pass into her pants. Just as girls shouldn’t assume that they’re entitled to free drinks because they are female. Make sure that she’s not hopping from boy toy to boy toy looking for guys to continually fuel her party. Be smarter than the drunken girl.

Beware of the hot chick that conveniently becomes overly friendly just before you place your drink order. If the situation seems too good to be true, sadly enough, it probably is. Tell her the line’s behind you.

So guys, if you’re cool with having some chick take advantage of you without you benefiting at all – it’s your choice.  However, if you’re not, beware because “the leaching bar bitch” could be right next to you and ready to strike!

Filed under Social · Tagged with , , ,

How to Pick Up the Bartender

Posted by on August 29, 2010 · Leave a Comment 

Approaching a bartender can be difficult, believe it or not guys it’s feasible. Most female bartenders are confident, sarcastic, no BS girls. It’s important to understand the type of girl you’re dealing with before attempting to hit on her. Unfortunately as bartenders, we’ve seen many of you overly intoxicated, doing things that would horrify you, if you could remember. Those of you who don’t succumb to the drunken antics of your fellow dudes, we apologize but you’ve already been grouped together by default.

If you think a bartender is hot, cute or maybe just intriguing and you’re interested in taking her out here are a few pointers:

Become one of her regulars
The best thing to do is become one of her regulars. A good bartender should remember your usual drink order, try to take your order first and might be able to provide an occasional drink on the house. Try introducing yourself and get the bartender’s name. On the next visit, greet her by name and try to initiate a casual conversation – keep it simple. Once you feel comfortable, go for it. One of the most important pieces to this puzzle is making sure you’re sober when you finally ask her out.

Maintain a friendly relationship
Establishing a friendly relationship is a good way to make her comfortable and remove you from the “just another drunk guy” category. Make sure to avoid cheesy pick up lines, because no girl really falls for that crap. Ask her if she’d like to grab some coffee or even frozen yogurt sometime. Maybe your buddy is having a BBQ, ask if she’d like to come hang out. The key is to get her out of the work environment and somewhere you can get to know each other. This doesn’t mean a candle lit dinner for two or a date to the movies.

Good luck, I’d love to hear about any success or even crash and burn stories.

Filed under Social · Tagged with , , , ,

The Desert

Posted by on August 25, 2010 · Leave a Comment 

Many of you may be asking yourself – what in the heck is The Desert? Those of you in the bar industry already know, but most people know the desert as a scorching area with endless miles of sand; the sun beats down on you and there’s nothing to drink in sight. Well, when a customer is either being an a-hole, just plain difficult, or not tipping all night they go to The Desert. Since we do not posses the ability to ship rude people to an actual desert, we simply put them in a place where we can keep them mentally. Consider it a bar time out. For example, if you approach me in a defensive manner about a problem with your drink while giving me attitude, rather than give me the chance to actually assist you, you might get placed in The Desert. I would notify my fellow bartenders that you’re in The Desert and you will not be served until we feel the need to remove you from The Desert. I’ll put it plain and simple: we are going to flat out ignore you because you’re being a prick. We are not trying to out-jerk any of these newfound Desert-dwellers because, let’s face it, we can’t win some of those battles. Us bartenders have little power when it comes to rewiring a customer’s poor attitude – we can’t force you to be a better tipper or a nicer person – but we can stop serving you.

Busy bars clearly have the upper hand in this situation. Since there are several people waiting to order their drinks, it’s better for me to take my chances on someone new. I’ve got a 50% chance to get someone new who tips with decency, rather than the 100% certainty of a bad attitude and no tip with the previous jerkoff. If you have stiffed me on tips all night or been rudely demanding, it’s more satisfying for me to ignore you. Being rude back to you is only going to add fuel to your fire and force me to waste unnecessary time on you. However, if I ignore you it’s going to piss you off but in a way that doesn’t further piss me off. Since my life doesn’t need your drama, I get to just walk away and let you fester with anger. People don’t like to wait, especially in a bar. The icing on the cake: I’ve shared your Desert status with my fellow bartenders so no matter where you go, everyone will ignore you.

I know some bartenders ignore pissy customers because they’ve got their head too far up their own ass, but most will ignore you for a purpose. Know you are an asshole but don’t know how to change? Try to not start off by being rude and thinking of yourself all the time. Have your order ready because Im the one working and busy here. Then try throwing down a worthy tip to show you know I’m working hard for you. Trust me, taking care of your bartender will always work to your benefit, especially if you become a regular. A bartender always remembers a good tipper and will go out of their way to give you preferential service! If these concepts remain too elementary for you, what goes around comes around. Next in line!

Filed under Social · Tagged with , , , , ,

How to Avoid Being Ignored by The Bartender

Posted by on June 10, 2010 · Leave a Comment 

Now, this may seem very basic to many of you and after all ordering a drink should only require a little common sense right?  Well, it would be that simple if everyone had common sense, but unfortunately that isn’t always the case.  Ordering a drink actually requires some technique.  Of course, if you are a regular at the bar it will give you a huge advantage over those who aren’t.  For those of you exploring a new bar or just a bar you don’t happen to be a regular at, these tips are for you!

I know it can be frustrating when you’re trying to order a drink and it seems like no matter what you do or where you stand, the bartender doesn’t acknowledge you.  Believe it or not, most bartenders do keep a mental note of who is next and try to help customers in some kind of order.  The system isn’t fool proof when dealing with a crowded bar when every customer thinks they were there first, so try to be patient.

Now, I’m well aware of the bartenders who think they’re god’s gift to alcohol and make you feel like they’re doing YOU a favor by taking your order.  Let’s face it, I want your tip just as much as you want your drink so bottom line is that we both want something from each other so why play games?

In order to figure out how to get the bartender’s attention, you need to know what to avoid.  Just because a bartender’s head is down does not mean they aren’t paying attention to their surroundings.  We have our heads down most of the time to make drinks (after all that is our job), we need to watch our pour, get ice, locate the alcohol/ingredients to make your drinks, etc.  The lack of eye contact serves a purpose at times, it is not intended to ignore you so don’t take it personal.  Having said that, when you wave your hands in the air like a maniac from the other end of the bar it isn’t a trigger for us to rush over to you immediately and take your order.  In fact, it does the opposite and you just got yourself a free pass to the back of the line, congratulations!

Being an asshole never gets you very far in life and the bar industry is no exception.  If you start swearing at the bartender or lecturing them about how long you’ve been in line you’re just going to end up waiting even longer.  We’re bartenders not morons (well I can’t speak for everyone).  If you’re already pissed off before you’ve placed your order you’re probably going to stiff me on the tip and be an asshole once I get to you, so what’s the point of dealing with you?  If I move to the next person who isn’t complaining I at least have a 50/50 chance of getting a tip and hopefully a 100% chance of not getting any attitude.

Telling a bartender you’re next and you’ve been waiting a long time is another topic to avoid.  Like I said, we do our best to ensure everyone gets their drink as quickly as possible.  Most of the people who say they’ve been waiting for 20 minutes are exaggerating and probably haven’t even waited 10 minutes.  When you’re in a crowded bar and the bartenders appear to be moving quickly there isn’t much more that can be done.  You just have to be patient and wait your turn, being polite helps too.

After all people, you’re in the bar/club to grab some drinks and have a good time.  Why start the night being pissed off because you had to wait a few extra minutes to get your drink.  All it will do is ruin your night and it definitely won’t make your drinks magically appear.  So just chill out and relax.  You’ll attract the bartender’s attention much quicker if you look like you’re having a good time than you will if you look pissed off.  Keep this in mind, the more customers I help, the more potential there is for me to make money.  Ultimately it doesn’t benefit me in anyway to ignore you or avoid serving drinks.  So smile, be patient and know that I’m trying to get to you as quickly as I can.  Hopefully we can both benefit from this mutual understanding- you can get your drink on and I can bring in that cash money!

- Roxi

Filed under Social · Tagged with , , , , , , ,

Introducing Roxi: The Bar Temptress

Posted by on May 29, 2010 · Leave a Comment 

Roxi’s my name and bartending’s my game!  As a bartender, I’ve seen all sorts of interesting things. From the usual drunken drama to some really cool people I’ve met and literally everything in between.  I’ll share all sorts of funny stories, behind the scenes information, as well as drink and shot recipes with you. One of my purposes of writing this column is to help you be a better customer, a more desirable date and hopefully have more luck with “All the Single Ladies.”  But before we indulge in all the drunken drama, let me give you a taste of the “Roxi” outside of the bar.

Growing up, all the neighborhood kids my age happened to be boys. All my cousins in my age group were also boys.  Boys, boys, boys…what can I say, I guess I’ve grown up sort of being one of them.  Sure, I love pink and anything that sparkles, but I really know how to relate to guys. I’ve always been Daddy’s girl, but I know my dad was hoping I’d be a boy so I think he was always tougher on me than my little sister.  I like to get dolled up like most girls do, and I can do it like the best of ‘em, but I’m just as comfortable and content without all the glitz and glamour.

Another reason I relate to guys easier is that I’m interested in a lot of traditionally male things like sports, food and sleeping. :)  Don’t get me wrong, I have great female friends also. But I’ll be the first to admit, girls often bring too much drama.  Let’s face it – life is too short and we’ve got too much on our plates to waste time with that B.S.  I’m not trying to give my girls a bad name, but facts are facts. There is much more drama with a group of girls than there is with a group of men.  Don’t get too smug guys; some of you can be drama too! ;)  However, guys in general are simple and the sooner my fellow ladies realize that, the better off we’ll all be.

I’m a versatile girl with many interests. I enjoy cooking and love baking!  Although I like to take care of myself, I’m not one of those girls who live off celery sticks and rice cakes.  In fact, I’d eat prime rib smothered in horseradish with a loaded baked potato on the side every night if I could ensure it wouldn’t bite me in the ass and clog my arteries one of these days.  Football and baseball are two of my favorite sports to watch. Not only do I enjoy watching and playing sports, but I also understand them.  Lounging on the couch on a cold Fall Sunday watching football all day is actually something I look forward to.  Would you believe that I even draft my own Fantasy Baseball team every year?  And I’ve been known to host some of the best Super Bowl parties complete with a great spread of food, football pools, and games with prizes throughout the event. I’m also a golfer and yes, my Nike Slingshots do more than just sit in my bag and look pretty.  Not only do I know the “P” does not stand for putter, but I also know what par, birdie, eagle and even albatross mean.

I’ve always been a versatile person and able to fit in with many different groups of people: male, female, old, young, various ethnic backgrounds, financially sound or struggling.  I can be found dancing in a mini dress with a pair of stilettos or involved in a sporting event wearing a baseball cap and jeans.  To sum it all up, I’m an all-around girl with a variety of interests!

Well, I’m hoping I’ve given you enough info about me so you trust that I’m here for you as I contribute thoughts to Male Standard. So, continue to check out my columns and all the information I throw your way. I also look forward to hearing from you, so feel free to email me with any questions you may have for me.

Bottoms up,

Roxi

Filed under Social · Tagged with , , , , , ,